Flash forward to this afternoon. It was a raw, drizzly, windy day in New England. The coolest we've had in weeks. Lower 40's. Yuk. That was the physical scene of today. Mentally, I was also having a day that probably mirrored the weather. Irritability, short temper, an extreme degree of indecision. Long story short, I bent my schedule around my sister's school day in order to run an errand in preparation for the 80 degree weather projected this coming weekend. Late afternoon, my sister and I are making the 50 minute journey to our father's house to pick up her car as well as a few other things...
By things I mean kayaks. My father has two old kayaks that have been sitting out on the side of his hill for two years. As I've expressed before, I prefer exercise methods that center around an activity verses going to a gym. While my style of kayaking is far from a full body workout, it is none the less a good form of exercise. Fresh air, a healthy distance from my kitchen where the snacks call my name all day long, the perfect way to kick off spring. So really, it was an absolute must to save these poor sad kayaks from a life of futility.
Upon arriving we had to practically shovel out the kayaks from piles of yard debris. We dragged the neglected beasts to the driveway and decided to hose them down and remove the leaves from the cavity, all the while hoping we were not disturbing a small critter that had taken up residence during the kayaks' inactive years. Lucky for us no furry critters amongst the leaves. However, not so lucky for us to be hosing the kayaks down in that drizzly 40 degree weather. Our hands were raw, pant legs wet. Ick...mess. All in the name of exercise, arm shaping exercise. I'm determined to have guns like Michelle Obama without actually having to lift weights!!
Some time later, we wrestled the kayaks on top of my car and started spinning a web of intricate knots and loops, none of which gave me any additional confidence this was going to be highway safe. My sister assured me she had done this before and it would be fine. I expressed concern but had no better idea than what she was crafting. All the while that tiny little voice in my head was quietly saying "I don't think this is a good idea...is it really worth risking our lives as well as others on the road for the sake of exercise au natural this coming weekend?" I was thankful my father was no where in sight being tucked away miles away at work while my sister and I plowed forward with this idea. He is a TOTAL control freak and we will be perpetually 10 years old in his mind. In his eyes we are barely capable of paying our own bills much less transporting two kayaks 50 miles home. However, in this case I may concede he'd have been right.
Skepticism aside, I pulled out of the driveway and down the street at a snail's pace. Before even reaching the end of the road I was calling my sister on her phone as she was in her car trailing behind me asking if they looked OK. Ever confident she's said they were fine. A short while later we were off the backroads blazing down the highway at 55 miles an hour. Of course the drizzle had picked up as well the occasional gust of wind. Did I mention my toddler was on board for this field trip? She was holding one of the ropes threaded through the car convinced her touch alone was going to keep those kayaks nice and secure! If only.
We only got seven miles before I was knew this was among the stupider things I'd done. The blanket underneath the boats was acting as a sail and working pretty well on blowing the kayaks upward. There was no real place to anchor the boats in the front so we'd just done the best we could tying them through the front seats. I knew it was only a matter of time before we'd be that car on the side of the highway darting in and out of cars trying to pick up the scattered belongings all over the highway. Who hasn't seen that car on the road - you know, the guy who loses a mattress off his pick up and all the traffic is speeding and honking around it. The entire initial seven miles, my daughter was so excited about the bouncing noise the boats were making on the roof as they shifted around.
Lucky for us just as the kayaks made a large shift to the right side of the roof we came upon a weigh station. Phew. Once again, luck was on our side and an otherwise stupid decision was allowed to be forgiven by the powers that be before impending doom. In the rain we popped the hood, looked under the car, even debated tying the boats down via the license plate (thankfully I had the foresight to know this would never work). In the end we were able to improvise using the grate of the front of the car to anchor the boats down to prevent further shifting in the driving process. My daughter thought this was a blast and from her nice dry car seat she kept saying "Good job mom, that looks good. I'll hold the rope for you." After careful examination and the blessing of a 3 year old, I stepped on the gas and we were on our way....again.
Now, if Spider Man drove a car, I imagine it would look something like what I was driving. Ropes everywhere - looking through the windshield was like looking through a spider's web. It did seem to do the trick, and at 55 miles an hour we crept home in the right hand lane. Traffic whizzed past looking annoyed that some lady was idiot enough to be driving two kayaks in the rain during evening traffic. Alas, we made it home and breathed a sigh of relief (even more my sister than I seeing as she'd have likely been the one taken out by a flyaway kayak!) If we weren't on a diet I'm sure we'd have cracked open a bottle of wine!
Lucky for me my father doesn't read my blog (sad but true) so I think my poor decision making ability will go unnoticed. That way the next time I have a really stupid idea that seems good at the time, I'll be left to my own devices....and hopefully luck will remain on my side!
I'm pretty sure the rear window wiper was not designed to be used as an anchor.
Spider Man's Super Hero Car - a webbed masterpiece!
1 comments:
That reminds me of a top carrier that Jeremy tied to the top of our Pilot for a 16 hour drive back from Massachusetts. He claimed (I flew with Cameron) that it felt like it was going to fly off the entire time. I'll see if he was right when we head out on our vacation this summer....lots to pack so the carrier is coming with us. Enjoy the kayaks!
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